Thursday, March 11, 2021

God Walks With No Shoes On

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I was the best little boy in the world. Ask anyone in this household and no one would question that. People here have always impressed upon my mind everything there is to tell about God. "The King that resides in the clouds," they would tell me. "When you're a good boy, He will give you lots of gifts. But beware… if you're bad, He will surely punish you very harshly!" And being the child that I am, I easily believed it. I pictured this towering man of muscular physique and hard expression on His face and long flowing hair and beard being whipped about by the winds. And since He is within the clouds, maybe He also commands the lightning, which illuminates His face and casts fierce shadows about Him. For thirteen long years, I have kept that picture of God in my head�a God borne of fear. Thirteen years, I have been afraid of all the horrible things He might do to me just because of a slight slip on my part. It has been in my core to always be pleasing in His sight. Thirteen long years of being a mindless robot.


But then of course, the protective shell of my innocence cannot conceal me from the realities of the world forever. I slowly felt it crack open and open me up to each and every complexity life has to present. I sank into a world of confusion and depression. I started asking questions on existence and issues of morality. Who's and when's never meant anything to me. I started asking the why's and what's. It was a very hard period I went through. I had no friends to talk to back then, I could never talk to my family about it because we weren't really a close-knit group. I felt no great love for anybody. I was totally neutral. I forgot about God. I didn't feel any benediction from him within that time. The world revolved around me and me alone, and it was all I could do to hold on to dear life.


But then, there was this one particular night last year, I think it was around past 1 midnight and I was walking at Makati Avenue (towards the waterfall in Peninsula Manila). I was just going home from one of my evening strolls around the metro to clear my heads of certain emotional cobwebs. (It was a tough night for me. I spoke with someone I shouldn't have spoken to, had another fight with my father, best friend was off somewhere busy with her work…) As I was walking slowly and was about to turn around the bend, I heard this faint humming. My ears perked, and I looked up. I saw this yuppie-type guy, clean cut in a long sleeved blue polo shirt, black slacks, coat slung on his shoulder… and no shoes. He did the most peculiar thing… As he passed me by, he looked at me and smiled and said, "Good evening." I was silent as my gaze followed him strolling towards Buendia until he was out of my sight.


I couldn't believe it. There I was, standing like some idiot looking at nothing, and whispering to myself, "There He is. There's God right there. Walking to Buendia, probably going home… and without shoes on." How I knew, I really couldn't tell. Every assurance, every glimmer of hope radiated in that one smile. All doubts eliminated. He loved me. He loved me for who I am, and not for what others think or say of me. At that moment I was content. No wise man nor philosopher nor moralist nor any self-righteous fundamentalist religious fanatic nor teacher nor priest nor priestess nor judge nor jury nor president nor prime minister would ever shake whatever my God has shown me that night. He has shown me everything that is simple yet true. I knew God is with me. A God borne of love, and not of fear.Custom Essays on God Walks With No Shoes On


I walked home barefoot that night.


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